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My Baby the Chimp (10/19/2007)

released: Oct 19, 2007

description: Steve Johnson is trudging through his dreary life: his alarm goes off at the same time every morning and he shuffles through his mess of an apartment, doing only what is absolutely necessary to make himself presentable enough to meet his car pool. His fellow car poolers comment about how they are running out of friends to set him up with, and he retorts that he cannot be tied down to one woman. They drive to their monotonous office job, passing the Flosson Laboratories on the way.

At Flosson, a team of doctors are using chimpanzees to test cosmetics. The chimps are miserable, and that night, Herman steals Otis the janitor's keys from his pocket. He uses them to release his friends Sylvester and Tiny Goliath, and they immediately kill the security guard, steal his car, and set out to the streets. They come across Steve, who is walking while enjoying a slice of pizza and a 40. They pluck him from the street and haul him into the car, setting off to his apartment.

Steve is confused, but welcomes the chimps into his home. They set about cleaning up the place, and Steve finds that he can possibly have a comfortable deal with the chimps. They all snuggle into his bed together, and the next morning, Steve is not only completely groomed and put-together, but on time for his car pool. His co-workers all take note as they set off for work, leaving the chimps alone in Steve's apartment.

At the office, Steve is called into a meeting where he is introduced to Herr von Stein, an employee of Flosson Laboratories who is now hunting the escaped chimpanzees. Von Stein believes the chimps to be much more dangerous than they may appear. Steve feigns illness and rushes home to discover the chimps have murdered the mailman and stashed him in the bathtub. Steve is livid, but the chimps attempt to make up for it by presenting Steve with an elaborate candlelit dinner and a date for the evening -- Carla, who they have kidnaped and kept in the closet.

Despite the bizarre circumstances, Steve and Carla enjoy their meal together. Just as they begin to connect, Herr von Stein approaches the building. The chimps hear the door as they are tying Carla to the bed, and immediately go into attack mode. Steve tries to reason with them, but, being chimps, they will not listen, and mistakenly kill a neighbor. Von Stein witnesses this and orders the chimps to go back to the labs with him, or else he will destroy them. Steve refuses to allow that, and a struggle ensues. Sylvester is killed in the fray, and Steve can take no more. He grabs von Stein's fallen gun and orders everyone into the car -- he is releasing the chimps at the wildlife preserve.

At the preserve, he lets von Stein go, even as he promises Steve will be going to jail for this. Steve and the two remaining chimps hold a somber funeral for their fallen friend, and Steve tells the chimps that one of them is well worth three humans to them, so he supposes everything was handled fairly. The chimps and Steve part ways.

Steve talks through the prison security glass to Carla, who turns out to have enjoyed her time with him despite being abducted and restrained. They talk, happily ignoring their current obstacles, as two monkeys disguised in a trench coat watch with approval.

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