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The Raspberry Imperative (09/28/2007)
released: Sep 28, 2007
description: Amidst rows and rows of filing cabinets piled on top of each other, a solitary worker carefully steals a red folder. Robert McAllister stuffs the folder in his shirt and hurries to his car where his friends Tyler LaTrobe and Curt wait. They casually try to make their way through the security booth, but an Awesome Blossom mix-up causes them to panic and they speed through. This causes Claire Weathers to inform Mr. Turpenteen, CEO of this filing operation, of the security breach. He immediately has the workers stop filing and tells them to check inventory.
Meanwhile, the three filers deliver their contraband to an abandoned warehouse, where they are greeted by Mr. Demetrius. They demand their payment of $30 million in exchange for the folder. Mr. Demetrius directs them to the fish tank, where they uncover a key. He tells them the key is to a bank box where they will find their money.
Mr. Turpenteen has discovered that the men have taken the Raspberry Imperative, which is a map of the location of all the United States nuclear warheads. Immediately, two United States generals enter his office and demand he locate the folder and return it to its rightful home.
Robert, Tyler, and Curt make their way to First National Bank, where Betsy Witherspoon directs them to the security box that corresponds to their key. Inside, they find another key. Betsy chuckles and tells them they would probably do well to look in the place where it all began. The three men are forced to make a quick escape before she can say anymore, though, as the two generals enter the bank. They question Betsy and give her a tiny phone in case of emergency.
The three men make their way back to the filing plant, where they find Mr. Turpenteen has had the workers burn all the remaining files. They ponder their next move, and their hesitation causes them to find themselves held at gunpoint by Mr. Turpenteen and Claire. Mr. Turpenteen further discloses that they are standing on the Doomsday device – the key to which the three men found in the bank box.
Mr. Demetrius, previously thought dead, rushes into the fray and begs the men to give the key over to him. They demand payment, and Mr. Turpenteen and Claire try to barter with them. As this carries on, the generals enter the scene. It is disclosed during this standoff that Mr. Demetrius wants the key so that he can take control of Utah and live in peace with his four wives.
The men are confused as to whom they can trust, until finally, Mr. Turpenteen overtakes the guns, shoots everyone he can, and makes an impassioned speech about doing what is right for America. As he continues to shoot, the key flies into the air, and he splits it with a bullet. The two pieces fall into the grate, and the only key to the Doomsday device is sadly lost. Triumphant, Mr. Turpenteen hops on his motorbike and rides into the sunset.
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